Lately I’ve been feeling a little off.
Not in any big, dramatic way… but just enough to notice that I haven’t been feeling quite like myself.
As I started paying attention, I realized it was a collection of little things contributing to this feeling.
It’s been almost four weeks since I’ve done a dedicated workout (beyond walking in our neighborhood, which definitely counts!). I’ve found myself skipping breakfast or lunch, only to grab snacks that don’t actually leave me feeling great. I’ve been sleeping a little later, which means missing the quiet morning time I’ve always loved. My water bottle sits full on my desk far more often than I’d like to admit. And somehow, my phone has started filling little pockets of time that used to feel calmer.
My first instinct was to chalk all of this up to being busy. However, the more I’ve thought about this, the more I’ve realized that’s not the whole story.
Since becoming a mom, one of the biggest shifts I’ve experienced isn’t just that I have less time. It’s that I have less predictability.
Before Ben, if I planned to go to a workout class on Tuesday morning, I probably went to a workout class on Tuesday morning. If I planned to wake up early, I usually did.
Now? A rough night of sleep, an illness, an unexpected appointment or simply a hard week can change everything.
I think I’ve been struggling to get healthy habits to stick because I’m trying to build habits using an old blueprint. The routines that worked before motherhood don’t always fit the season I’m in now.
So instead of trying to recreate the routines I had before Ben, I’ve been thinking about what healthy habits could look like for this season.
It’s tempting to look at a list of healthy habits and think I should get back on track because it’s the “right” thing to do.
However, as one of my favorite quotes about happiness goes “One of the best ways to make other people happy is to be happy yourself.“
Now, that doesn’t mean I need to be cheerful all the time. But the quote does remind me that how I care for myself affects how I show up for the people I love.
When I’m consistently moving my body, eating real meals, getting enough sleep and drinking enough water, I’m more patient. Less irritable. I have more energy and generosity to give.
I definitely don’t have it all figured out yet. I’m still experimenting, changing my mind and trying to build routines that fit this season of life. But I always find it helpful to hear how other people think through these kinds of things – not because I want to copy their routines exactly, but because one idea can often spark something for my own life.
So, in case it does the same for you, here are a few of the healthy habits I’m hoping to return to – and how I’m thinking about making them work right now.
Habit 1: 😴 Prioritizing Sleep
My favorite way to start the day is waking up sometime in the 5 o’clock hour and having some quiet time to read, journal and simply enjoy the calm before the day gets started.
But lately, I haven’t been able to get myself out of bed until just a few minutes before Ben wakes up around 7.
Part of me knows my body is probably craving the extra sleep… but I also really miss my quiet mornings!
What I can control, though, is when I get into bed at night (which, in the summer, is surprisingly harder to do when it stays light so late here in Indy!).
So for now, I’m keeping it simple: in bed reading by 8:30 p.m.
Then, for the next few weeks, I’m setting my alarm for 6:00 a.m. Not too ambitious – just enough time to ease back into the habit. Once that feels normal, I’ll move it to 5:45. Then maybe 5:30.
The easiest way to get myself to stick with this? Having a GREAT book I’m reading. If I can’t wait to read another chapter, I’m much more likely to head to bed instead of scrolling my phone for another half hour.
Right now, I’m reading The Calamity Club, and it’s absolutely delivering. I can barely put it down. At more than 600 pages, I’m hoping it keeps this bedtime routine going for a while!
Habit 2: 🥗 Fueling Myself
Ahhhh, meals… why is this so hard?!
Maybe it’s because unlike going to bed on time, eating well isn’t one decision. It’s dozens of little decisions throughout the day.
The other week, I picked up a new cookbook in hopes it would give me some fresh inspiration, and it did!
One thing I especially loved was the focus on meal planning and prepping. Nothing groundbreaking, but sometimes I don’t need groundbreaking – I just need someone to remind me of the basics.
My biggest takeaway was the recommendation to prep breakfasts and lunches on Sunday. I’ve done this before, and it really does make a difference. It removes so many decisions during the week and makes it much easier to reach for something nutritious instead of grabbing whatever’s quickest.
So for the next few weeks, that’s exactly what I’m going to focus on.
Habit 3: 🏃♀️ Regular Movement
I’ve accepted that, for right now, my workout routine won’t look like it did before becoming a mom. And that’s okay.
But as I’ve been thinking about it, I’ve realized there are elements of my old routine that I can bring into this season. Before Ben, most weekday mornings started with a group fitness class, and I loved it.
While that’s not realistic every day anymore, I’m thinking about adding one early Orangetheory class on Tuesday mornings (once I’m in a good grove with my prioritizing sleep habit). It would require coordinating with Matt on the Ben front, but I think having that one class as an anchor each week would make a big difference.
Beyond that, I’d love to pick one other weekday morning for a workout at home – whether that’s going for a run or doing a workout in our basement.
Two workouts during the week (+ continuing to walk as much as possible) feels realistic.
Habit 4: 📵 Intentional Phone Use
When Ben was really little, I got into a not-so-great habit of scrolling Reddit during middle-of-the-night feedings. It helped me stay awake and made those quiet hours feel a little less lonely. But the problem is the habit has stuck even after overnight wake-ups are (thankfully) less frequent.
Lately, I’ve been finding myself reaching for my phone during little pockets of the day (and often scrolling Reddit). I don’t love that, and often I see something that affects my mood.
So, for the next few weeks, I’m encouraging myself to stop opening Reddit by default. To help with this, I also want to get in the habit of leaving my phone in another room more often so it’s not always within arm’s reach (especially when I’m with Ben in the morning & evening).
Lastly, I think I’ll pick up Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport and read it again. I remember one of the book’s biggest messages is about how to use technology intentionally, and that feels like exactly the reminder I need right now.
So, there you have it! Those are the four habits I’m focusing on over the next few weeks.
None of them are particularly groundbreaking, but my hope is that by making them flexible and realistic, they’ll be easier to keep up with – even when life gets (inevitably) unpredictable.
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